By Carson Hunter

Rosie O’Donnell was right: traveling on the maiden voyage of R Family Vacation’s first family cruise was just like experiencing her television show. The cruise was full of games, give-aways, and best of all, her beloved Broadway shows. Though advertised as "the family cruise," one could easily call it "the Broadway cruise," because entertainment on our voyage was like having nightly tickets to a show on that famous New York strip. For a theatre geek like myself, this was absolute heaven. In fact, the talent pool onboard was so deep and the performance schedule so packed, it was impossible to see all the entertainers, many of whom are appearing in Broadway productions this season. At this writing, Kelli O’Donnell was unable to tell me who is booked to perform on the next cruise though she did assure me that "we’ve got all of Broadway knocking down our door; it’s the big buzz who gets to go on the cruise next year."

During the day, I attended seminars on surrogacy, adoption, and a session on marketing to the gay community. The Family Pride Coalition, Chrissie Gephart, and the HRC’s Elizabeth Birch also hosted presentations. Of course R Family offered traditional cruise activities as well, like napkin folding, fruit carving, and the ever-popular shuffleboard. (Does anyone really play shuffleboard?) You could get a massage, a facial, take an aromatherapy class, or of course, just hang out by the pool and get loaded.

Part of the fun of a cruise is that you get to actually rub shoulders with celebrity performers. Sure enough, I spotted Joy Behar from The View sitting at a blackjack table. I saw Tony Award winner Christine Ebersole at the buffet (she likes pizza). I spied lesbian standup comedian Judy Gold, hovering with all the other mothers around the pool where their kids were swimming. Euan Morton, star of the Broadway show Taboo, was hanging out in the nightclub. And then there was Rosie, who willingly posed for photos with any guests who asked. I spotted her in the video arcade, at the club, introducing several acts all over the ship every night, and I noticed her tucked away at most shows, offering support and encouragement to all the performers. When Rosie entertained, acting as emcee for many of the shows, she unleashed her wicked sense of humor. She let fly on everything from the "sister-friends" around the pool to the fact that even though she was a "kabillionaire," she still had to borrow ten bucks for the video arcade. O’Donnell’s wit is still biting and judging from the crowd's enormous response, I'll bet she makes an imminent return to standup. At the very least, Kelli O’Donnell assured me that they were going to "kick it up a notch" for the next cruise. I

Founders Kelli O’Donnell and Gregg Kaminsky worked their tails off too, dancing in a show, dressing up like pirates, and directing a huge staff. I wouldn’t be surprised if they now need a good long vacation after this vacation.

R Family employs a "freestyle dining" program, which eschews assigned dining hours and assigned dining tables in favor of allowing guests to dine at the hour of their choice, in any one of the ten restaurants onboard the ship. The upside of freestyle dining is that you can simply hop from restaurant to restaurant, and eat whenever you want, all day long. You can also grab a bite in many of the bars, in the casino, or partake in twenty-four-hour room service, which is included. For some regular cruise-goers, this lack of assigned tables didn’t lend itself to socializing and took a little getting used to. For families with children, freestyle dining can be a blessing, since the kids can get pizza or burgers at an early hour, which allows parents the opportunity for a fine dining experience later on. Yes, the ship even has babysitting services, which are free up until 10:00 p.m.

You don’t need children to travel on an R Family Cruise but it helps. Kids made friends ‘round the pool and then drew their parents into their little clusters. Guests should expect to find kids all over the ship…even at the 11 p.m. comedy nights, which were, in theory "adult’s only" zones. This provided for some pretty funny moments when comedians realized that there was a heavy sprinkling of kids in the audience, hanging on to their every four-letter word. Oh well, you know what they say about the family that plays together. The main pool area was overrun with kids and the casual buffet-style restaurant was constantly ringing with the cheers of the Kid’s Club members, singing proudly as counselors lead them through the restaurant. Every evening there was an outdoor BBQ with some sort of child-friendly theme night, complete with face painting, balloon animals, and clowns and pirates galore.

I must admit though, with over 500 children onboard, the kids were never intrusive and I found them all to be exceedingly well behaved. I never even saw anyone running in the hallways!

Ironically, the features that make the cruise perfect for families with children also make the cruise a great option for couples looking for a romantic getaway or who wish to cruise without being cruised. Children are not allowed in the casino or in the cocktail lounges, and families tended to favor the restaurants with the more kid-friendly menus or the child-sized buffets. Grown-ups who frequented the steakhouse or the sushi bar, usually had it to themselves. Families tended to turn in early, so it was easy to feel that you had the whole ship to yourself. I met many single parents on the cruise, but I didn’t meet any women traveling alone.

An R Family cruise is the perfect vacation solution for families that want to relax and rejuvenate in a safe, supportive environment. Many parents I spoke with were already talking about making the trip an annual, family event. Parents from small towns especially, welcomed the cruise as an opportunity for their children to meet other families like their own. The kids themselves told me that it was only on a trip like this or Parent’s Weekend in Provincetown, that they could relax and "not have to worry that anyone is going to hassle me."

Rosie O’Donnell had said that she wanted her television show to be the kind of show that the generations could watch together. She has also created a vacation experience that will do exactly that. The woman next door to me was traveling with both her daughter and her mother and I met many other adults travelling with their own parents. Kelli O’Donnell told me that, based on her records for the next trip, "People are really booking extended families, people who want to book their parents and their siblings and their friends. People are really embracing bringing extra people." Given that next year’s destination includes Massachusetts and offers a wedding package, it sounds like more than a few wedding parties are already in the works. So don’t forget your corsage when the Norwegian Dawn departs from New York to Halifax, making stops in Provincetown, Boston, and Martha's Vineyard.

R Family’s Cruise
Date: July 10 - 17, 2005
Ship: Holland America’s "Norwegian Dawn"
Number of Passengers: 2,500
Amenities: Ten restaurants, eight bars, juice bar, coffee bar, Internet café, casino, fitness center, duty free shop, spa, movie theatre, video game room, kid’s club, babysitting service, twenty-four-hour room service.
Dress Code: None
Required Documents: valid passport or a copy of your birth certificate

For a closer look at the R Family experience, watch for an upcoming May 2005 HBO special which was filmed onboard the ship. For more information: Call (866) 732-6822 or visit www.rfamilyvacations.com.